After three months in Uganda, I have realised that every week in Kampala offers a crash course in humility, humour, and the art of going with the flow. Here’s what I’ve learned (so far):

SafeBoda’s version of “tracking”: The moment your ride is confirmed, expect a phone call from your driver asking, “Where are you?” Never mind that they can literally see you on their app. Apparently, it is more fun to let the mzungu who has been here three months try to describe landmarks like, “I am near that one fruit stand… no, the other one.”

Running on fumes is not failure, it is faith: If your boda dies in the middle of traffic, relax. You are not out of gas. The driver just needs to pick up and shake the boda to release the reserve fuel. Then, with a whispered prayer and a healthy dose of adrenaline, you will coast to the next petrol station.

“It is ok” is the Swiss Army knife of phrases: It can mean yes, thank you, no worries, or please stop talking now. Context is everything.

“You look smart” : Here, it means you are well-dressed. (So yes, I am finally being called smart on a regular basis, and I am not correcting anyone.)

Armed guards are not red flags: If you see someone walking down the road with a massive rifle, do not panic. Chances are it is a security guard, and that gun has not been fired since before Netflix was invented.

Anything can be delivered on a boda: I saw two pigs; whole pigs strapped to the back of one. The driver looked completely unbothered. Just another Thursday.

Perspective is everything: Uganda’s current president has been in office since 1986 – and somehow, he is still younger than the last two US presidents. I will let that sink in.

Life in Kampala is a constant education – equal parts chaos, comedy, and community. I am learning (slowly) that it is all part of the rhythm.

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